...

I don't think I know how to deal with what I'd call "the real world". I have a fear of the world-- as cowardly as that sounds, I sorta do. But I know that once I get myself out there, I'll realize that it's not so bad after all. 

It's just that, I'm really a reserved person. And it's killing me. I don't know how to voice out what is really inside of me, and that frustrates others around me. I am just so used to directions and instructions (perhaps?).. to a point that I don't know how to make a way for myself, on my own. I'd much rather someone tell me what to do (not all the time).

나도 참 답답하다. 좋은 writer됬으면 좋겠다. 그보다 사람들에게 나의 마음을 제대로 전달하는 사람이 되었으면 좋겠다. 나는 욕심쟁이-- 내가 원하는 데로만 할려고 한다. When things are not as what I would want or desire, I don't TRY to venture forth. And that's being STUBBORN.

큰 문제: 행위를 취하는것. Get moving.

그리고 또 한 문제: losing interest in just about everything.. 

And ultimately, not able to offer my life as a true and living sacrifice.